A few simple questions will reveal many of these undesirable traits.
Be honest and forthright in your communications and expect the same from others.
If you must use a term, rather than a person's name, perhaps the term transgendered is the least offensive of all the terms.
This is a generic term that fits most t-girls and is rarely offensive.
When you are e-mailing, chatting online or exchanging Instant Messages, you must rely on mere words to make a good first impression.
No flaming, personal attacks or abuse against others. Notice the word "gentleman." When a t-girl feels that she is being treated with the dignity and respect befitting a lady she is in heaven.
Femininity is a tremendous satisfaction for t-girls and most love the attention from a gentleman admirer.
Others are bisexual (your chances are improving here). A dialog should be able to resolve any remaining questions you might have.
Some t-girls are looking for men, others are looking for women. Some live full-time as females, others live part-time as females. Remember that you're looking for someone who will compliment what you're looking for and your job is to narrow the field to those who are looking for someone just like you!